scorpio – Joan Porte

Mars in Retrograde – April to June

Mars does not retrograde often – about once every two years – but he will do so from April 18 to June 29 this year. Because of Mars’ attachment to war, anger and aggression traditional astrology labels him a malefic planet. In other words, he is not a planet that takes much guff. However, it does not mean that when he turns retrograde he becomes more malefic. Instead, like with all retrogrades, the energy turns more contemplative.

Do you have “anger issues?” By that I don’t just mean are you prone to road rage or screaming at everyone in your radius. Do you swallow your anger? Do you deflect anger into passive aggressive responses?

There is nothing basically wrong with anger and aggression. When channeled properly they make us change and grow. They keep us from negative situations or make us finally leave negative situations.

He will begin his retrograde at 8º Sagittarius. This fire sign will allow us to assess our more reactionary responses to our Mars energy. This is a more intense time and a good time to work if you are more of a reactor when angry. Why do you explode? Why can’t you control that fire in you?

Through May he heads all the way back to 23º Scorpio. Before the discovery of Pluto, Mars ruled Scorpio, a sign known for deep, intense feelings. This is a sign also known for holding grudges and brooding. If that is your way of expressing anger then this is your best time to work on a more positive methodology.

During this time of retrograde do an honest assessment of how you respond to situations that cause you consternation. If you fly off the handle or run and hide, this is the time to work on balanced responses.

Quintessential Leo Chart

I have a theory that people achieve fame in their lives because they have very sharply defined charts. They do not have any wishy-washy planets or aspects. On July 29, 1929, Jacqueline Bouvier was born with one hum-dinger of a pronounced chart.

With her South Node or karmic identifier in Scorpio in the first house she lived many lives addicted to drama, and passion – she saw the barriers of life – emotionally and sexually and insisted that they were there for her to break. Scorpios love living on the edge – and coming into life with this Scorpio memory, she was not interested in settling into a “normal” life.

Scorpio also sat on her first house, the house of personality. (Those dark glasses blocking out the world are a dead giveaway for someone who is trying to keep the prying world out – a very Scorpio trick.) Her life of intensity, life and death drama – and passion started with that South Node and Scorpio first house. In the eighth house, the one ironically linked to Scorpio was her Venus, the planet of love and Pluto, the planet of death and transformation. That she had a karmic relationship with her husband’s and they both ended with dramatic, Scorpio deaths was indicative of this placement. As I said, there was nothing wishy-washy about this chart at all.

Her need for money and security comes from her retrograded Saturn in the second house, the house of money and stability. Anyone with a retrograded Saturn has “daddy issues” – and she adored her wayward, womanizing father and we can say – married him twice. She needed old men with money to fill that retrograde.

With her North Node in Taurus – her goal in this life was to find inner peace and stability that I would argue she did at the end of the life – of course, with the help of her second husband’s millions but she did get there.

Mars Heading Into Scorpio

On July 26, Mars moves into Scorpio. Before Pluto made herself known to us, Mars was the ruler of the sign of Scorpio so Mars is very comfortable hanging out with Scorpio, although their plans of action are vastly different. Scorpio gets things done but in a subtle, some would sometimes say, sneaky way. Scorpio is a water sign, it grinds slowly and keeps pushing matters into the shape it desires, much like the ocean does to the shore. Mars, however, is all direct fire energy. He just burns his way through any obstacles until he reaches his goal. They are both creatures of action.

Mars is now hovering very close to Vesta, the asteroid that astrologically tells us where we have such a desire that we would climb over rocks to achieve. Vesta often throws those rocks in our place so that we can overcome them to ultimate success. Therefore, when the yearning of Vesta meets the drive of Mars in Scorpio there is no better time to defeat some roadblock that is preventing you from accomplishing some goal that has been on the back burner.

No excuses now – go for it!

Corn Planting Moon in Scorpio – May 14

Happy Corn Planting Moon (or Flower Moon.) I love these Moon names because they remind us of the days when we were really connected with nature and the energy of the Universe.

This Moon will be in the sign of Scorpio – the Sun, of course, is in the opposite sign of Taurus. A Moon is “full” when it is furthest from the Sun. If you have been following along with me in the past month when I spoke about the change that the “grand cross” brought to us, hopefully for the better, then view this Full Moon as the final brushstroke of that change.

Scorpio, ruled by Pluto, is the sign of change of transformation. Use this full Moon for a time to take the changes that you worked on during the “grand cross” for a test drive. What is working? What do you need to “tweak” and where are you falling back on your old ways?

The Moon will be at its fullest at 3;16 PM so while you won’t be able to see it then you can still tune into the energy.

Happy Full Moon and get the rows of new habits planted just as you would your corn!

The Blood Moon – April 15!!

The pink or “blood” full Moon* will take place during the lunar eclipse (you have to have a full moon to have an eclipse) on April 15. There is no doubt this is a very active astrological time (see my blog entry on the Grand Cross.) If you are one inclined to be spooked, the fact that this full Moon will occur when it is entering the constellation of Scorpio, coupled with the Grand Cross can make you a wee bit nervous. A blood Moon in Scorpio during the Grand Cross – lions and tigers and bears…

Fear not my stargazers. Think of the energy of an eclipse – bringing new energy. Combine that with the energy of Scorpio – the sign of personal change and transformation and you have all of that cardinal energy of the Grand Cross. Don’t bury your head in the sand in fear – use this time to make huge changes in your life. Come on!

In addition, if you are one who can contact the “other side” with some ease you will find that talent enhanced at this time. Scorpio is all about contact with those who have gone on before us. Even if you do not think you have this talent – sit quietly and concentrate on those who are no longer here. You might be seeing signs or hearing their voices.

*A blood Moon often happens during a lunar eclipse because the eclipse action scatters a lot of colors but not the red. That is a really shorthanded explanation but you get my drift.

Saturn Turned Inward

Saturn is making its slow, deep turn retrograde in Scorpio where it will remain until earlt July.

This is a perfect time to explore your limitations and fears. Where Saturn is your in chart is where you feel restricted. A retrograde is already an inward motion – we are to take the energies of that planet and explore and examine their meaning. With a retrograde in Scorpio – the most intense and inward looking planet – we are getting a double influence of energy demanding that we do some deep exploration.

Where is Saturn in your natal chart? Where is it by progression? Examine those houses and see the issues that you haven’t addressed, where are you over-committed, where have you been unable to say “No, I need that time for me.” Basically, where do we feel at loose ends in the areas controlled by these houses?

It is easy to blame problems on retrogrades but when we use the energy and the transformative power of a sign as powerful as Scorpio to find what structures you need to build to make your life run more efficiently.

Feeling Goofy???

Finding the Path, Arlenew.com

Are you feeling a little wacky, a little off-balance? Blame it on the Libra stellium now sitting over us. If you are on the East Coast of the U.S it is in the 8th house, if in Western Europe on the 7th and if on the West Coast it hovers somewhere between the two.

Libra is and air sign depicted by the Scales – Libra tries to seek balance but often it swings wildly. Libra is very concerned with the other person – not self and it’s biggest shadow is co-dependence. Libra also deploys her planet Venus to help us create things of beauty.

Right now we have the Sun, Mercury, Venus, Juno, Saturn and the Moon all hanging out together having a good old time in Libra. In a nut shell, this means we are looking for something to attach to, something or someone to join. Of course, if in the 7th house, the house ruled by Libra – this could be a wild time of people looking to resolve issues, please the other people in their life, forge new alliances. However, this is also a harbinger of a time of great creative expression – someone with well aspected Libra in their chart could find themselves finishing that scrapbook, working on that painting again or even finally cleaning up the bedroom and hanging the pictures!

The eighth house is a bit more tricky – this is the house of death and rebirth, it is also the house of insurance and goods of the dead. Feeling the need to literally shed old skin and do some heavy internal work – figure out where we are going – what we are doing with ourselves; these are all in the eighth house arena. This is a time of intense soul searching to say the least.

If this were all loopy enough those retrogrades that I spoke of last week have now crept up to first house – our house of personal expression. So on one hand we have this need to deal with this huge issues, what do I believe in, who should I commit to and on the other our personal energy and power are being dragged down by the retrogrades. How Libran! One side up – the other side down.

My suggestion – think about this big issue items but don’t try to act on them until the retros get moving out of 1 – better yet wait until they go away completely in the early New Year. Think, ponder, delve – then act in January!

How Pluto in Capricorn is WikiLeaks?

courtesy of Arlenew.com

Whatever you think of the whole Wikileaks thing whether it is treason or the height of patriotism — from an astrological stand point it epitomizes the concept of Pluto in Capricorn. When Pluto moves into a new sign, something it does every 15 to 20 years, it brings change to society – to the world — in the area that sign fuels.For instance, when Pluto was in Virgo in the early 1960’s we saw the rise of environmental movement and the “feminization of the workplace.” Virgo rules health and healthy eating and day to day work situations. When it later moved into Scorpio we saw the sexual revolution. Then when it went into Sagittarius we saw the rise of the “New Age” and spiritual movement. Each sign also has a shadow aspect – to every yin there is a yang. The rise of fundamentalism was the shadow of Pluto in Sagittarius, AIDS the tragic shadow of Scorpio.

Pluto brings to the front those things that were hidden. Women came behind the apron with Virgo. People with different sexual persuasions did during Scorpio’s reign and those with alternative religious beliefs during the spin in Sagittarius.

Now that it is in Capricorn we will see changes in structures that hold society together. First, we saw the collapse of the financial system, then, thankfully, we saw the election of the first African American President. What must come to the foreground now are those things that governments, banks and other authority figures wanted to keep hidden… ta da… Wikileaks.

Pluto just moved into Capricorn in 2008 and will be there until 2020 so it will be a long interesting ride. The last time it was in Capricorn was during the American and French Revolutions. See what I mean?

Happy New Year all.

Trapped in the Lion’s Den

You know that old adage, “the shoemaker’s child has no shoes?” Well sometimes the astrologer doesn’t use astrology!

Once a month three friends of mine meet for Saturday breakfast to discuss books of a spiritual or metaphysical nature. It is a great social and educational activity which we have been at for almost two years. The members of the little group are M, a beautiful Libra Sun – Leo rising healer who I would highly recommend to any of you interested in any form of energy work; C, a warm and wonderful Taurus Sun – Leo rising business and personal coach and D, a fascinating and fantastic double Gemini (Sun and rising) who is also an amazing coach. (Anyone looking to further their professional or personal goals needs to see these two. They do wondrous things!)

This month I brought another friend into the group. K is a very spiritual, deep and compassionate facilitator (and yes I would more than highly recommend her too.) She makes a great contribution to the group. However, as I sat around the breakfast table last Saturday I suddenly got a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach. K is an Aquarius Sun but Leo rising. That makes three out of five people who are, in essence, Leos! Oh what was I thinking? To make my situation more dire, I was without D – my other rising air sign. D had some housing problems and couldn’t join us. It was just me, poor defenseless Scorpio Sun, Libra rising, against three lions!

Remember, your sun sign is inner force what makes you tick inside. For instance, my Scorpio Sun gives me a desire to get to the core of mysteries; it makes me basically secretive and private (no really.) It is a person’s rising sign, the sign on the Eastern horizon at birth, also called the ascendant that gives us the persona we project to the world. Sun is inner – ascendant is outer.

Leo is ruled by the Sun and vibrates to the 5th house, the house of creativity and the projection of creativity. Leo’s gravitate to the spotlight; they feel comfortable in the warmth and light of the Sun. In meetings past it was never uncommon for our two Leo rising ladies to spontaneously burst into song during breakfast. D and I, the two air sign rising people just sit back and thoroughly enjoy the show provided by our 5th house friends.

Because the rising sign is our persona, it often dictates how we physically look. You can always spot a Leo the Lion by their manes! I remember one meeting, C arrived with her hair looking as stunning as always but she ran into the bathroom, pulled out her dryer and curling iron and proceeded to work on it until it met with her satisfaction. Now I am thinking, geez, I don’t take a hair dryer to Europe no less down the street for breakfast. My entire line of hair “product” consists of a bottle of Vo5 shampoo which is on sale at CVS this week for $.77 a bottle. I got three bottles, thank you very much. My hair styling ritual consists of wash, towel dry; take three fingers plump the hair for 20 seconds or until boredom sets in, which usually wins, and walk out the door. Libra – air sign – hair flies in the air. Leo the Lion, mane must obey.

So I go around the table. Next to me is M, coifed to the core. Across the table C sits. Can I find one hair our of place? I would have a better chance finding a sane person in Congress. And there next to her sits our newest lion, K, her stunning mane pulled back and perfectly framing her face. Note to self: maybe I should find my brush one of these days.

Someone mentions Aquarius and the alleged “Age Of” and that is all it takes for the lions to revert to the 70s and begin to sing “The Dawning of the Age of Aquarius.” Ok, this is good. I like lion serenades. Then someone says the dreaded words. “Let’s dance.” Dance! Dance! I am air and water (and with a heavy amount of water as I have a Pisces Moon.) Dance! I have not one Earth sign in my chart. I fall down while asleep in bed. However, they are off. M finds her CD of “Hair” and now there are three dancing lions and one Libra rising wishing for her Gemini rising friend to come to her aid.

Ok now here is the battle the Sun and ascendant often play out in our bodies. Scorpio Sun is saying you can’t join in they would know the extent of your klutziness – another secret revealed. Libra rising is saying you are a natural leader* and you can’t lead in dancing so you can’t do it. One of the most overlooked explanations for the bizarreness of human nature is the conflict between Sun and rising signs. If someone is rather contradictory, if their actions can’t be understood easily, check those two signs. If they are vastly divergent, particularly if the Moon is in a contrasting sign, that person is going to be difficult to pin down and often won’t understand what makes them tick.

What made me think it was a good idea to put three lions together? They are dancing around the living room! So I grab my blackberry and text my AWOL Gemini rising compatriot saying basically forget your house, come rescue me!

Seriously, it was a wonderful time and K is a great addition to our group. I just have to pay more attention to those rising signs so we Air signs don’t get burned in the fire!

*Libra is one of the cardinal Signs. There are fixed, mutable and cardinal signs. Fixed gives someone tenacity, mutable more amenable to change and melding and cardinal likes to lead. Mutables are Gemini, Virgo, Pisces and Sagittarius. Fixed are Taurus, Leo, Capricorn and Scorpio. Cardinals are Aries, Libra, Cancer and Aquarius

Pisces Rising, A Saga

So I am going along having a perfectly normal week – doing the charts – being the astrologer, when I enter a person’s birth data into my trusty computer and it comes up showing that they have PISCES RISING. Oh, this is never good. Who forces poor Pisces to be a rising sign in a person’s chart? It just seems so mean.

Pisces embodies the energy of what Jung called the collective unconscious. Pisces is the great spiritual ocean of energy from which all emerges. It is all about spirituality, brotherhood and union with the god source. To put it in charge of the ascendant, the rising sign which is a person’s projected persona – how they interact with the physical world — is just mean. Pisces doesn’t want to face the cruel realities of life on Earth any more than Dick Cheney wants to face cruel reality of what he did to this country for eight years. But I digress.

I can just see it now. Pisces gets the call that she once again is on the rotation to be a rising sign. “Oh no not again. I hate it there. Put me on the 12th house – come on, twelfth house, first house, they are right next to each other. I like the twelfth house. I am happy there… please. No? Dang. Now what do I do?”

Looking to her right, Pisces sees a warrior in a suit of armor cleaning his guns. “Psst Aries, hey Aries. Are you listening? Aries, switch with me. I have to be on this kid’s first house – that is your house. It is a natural for you. I will work my connections so you don’t have a lot of aspects getting in your way, you can get out there and make this kid a dynamo.”

“Yeah but what is in it for me?”

“The satisfaction of doing good and helping a neighbor. Aries pauses for a moment trying to absorb that concept, gives up and goes back to his guns.

“Pisces, stop wimping out. Do your duty. In the name of Mars, Man up.”

“But I am a feminine sign.”

“You never heard of Margaret Thatcher? Besides, I have better things to do. I am the first of the Cardinal and first of the fire signs. I am off to blaze a new trail. Go bother Taurus she never leaves the field but she might do you a favor she is a pretty good egg and far less selfish than I.”

“Hey Taurus. Oh you lovely bull sitting in your pretty pasture. Taurus, can you do me a favor? Taurus. Do you hear me? I am talking to you Taurus.”

Taurus slowly flips her tail at an annoying bee disturbing her sleep. “Is someone calling me? Oh isn’t the sky pretty today?”

“It is me, Pisces. You know who wants to put me on some kid’s first house again. I will just mess it up – making them all confused and overwhelmed with the complexities of life. You don’t seem to be doing anything, how about helping me out?”

“Not doing anything? I am enjoying the beauty that is all around my comfortable pasture. Oh it is time for another nap.”

“Taurus, Taur….argh” Pisces wanders away from the pasture and is immediately distracted by a whirlwind of activity. Being distracted is easy for Pisces and it takes a few minutes to figure out what is in front of her. “Oh it’s Gemini, my fellow sign of duality, Gemini. How about doing me a little tiny favor?

“What? No wait I am not talking to you.” Gemini grabs his blackberry and starts texting madly while switching to the phone on his other ear. “Yes, yes of course I am listening.” With his big toe Gemini taps out another message on his computer and with a free hand grabs for his I Pad. Pisces tries to get a word in but becomes momentarily mesmerized and then horrified by Gemini’s ability to carry on a third conversation now with the use of his Bluetooth and dashes away seeking comfort.

“Cancer, oh sorry I will use your more politically correct name, Moon Child. How good to see you and oh I smell banana bread and can I climb up on the big overstuffed chair? Yes, I would love a cup of chamomile tea, thank you. Your place is always so calming and boy do I need it. Oh, you already heard? Gemini told you what I needed? But how did he …..I know, I know, he grabs the thoughts right out of your head! Will you help me out?”

Moon Child spreads a comforter over Pisces tired shoulders. “Well now dear I would love to help you out but part of mothering and nurturing is forcing your children to face life’s responsibilities.”

“But that is just it. I don’t like life’s responsibilities. They make me so tired I just want to jump back into the ocean of unconsciousness where I can float along in peace and contemplate gods and goddesses and the universe and all of those big nebulous issues. I am a fish – life on Earth isn’t natural to me.”

“I am sorry dear but you will have to do this on your own. You will thank me some day. Have a nice healthy meal and a long rest before you continue. What is your favorite lullaby?”

The next morning Pisces sadly leaves Moon Child and swims off in the direction of Leo. “This will never work,” she muttered to herself. However, she is desperate and braces herself for the bright sunlight that always shines on Leo the Lion. “Ah, Leo, I mean your majesty, your royaltyness – your holiness. Um Leo, can you please, can I beg you to ….I need a favor of your royal selfness.”

“Is there someone there? Ah my good fish, can that you fetch that mirror in the corner?”

“Ah Ok but you have 12 surrounding you now.”

“Yes, what a paltry sum! No, not that one – the big one with the lights. It is so dark in here.”

Pisces drags over the 12 foot mirror as she tries to not be blinded by the lights shining on the Lion. “Your royalty I need a favor please, a small one indeed for such a wondrous being.”

“I think I am getting a wrinkle. No!”

“Um, hi I am over here. Remember me? Pisces. Can you please do one little….”

“That hair is 1000 of a centimeter out of place. I knew it!”

The light is giving Pisces a terrific headache and Leo is now rifling through his collection of hair brushes oblivious to any other living creature in the area, so Pisces moves on, her tail becoming lower in the process.

“STOP. Your fins are dirty.”

“Hi Virgo. No, I took a long bubble bath at Moon Child’s.”

“The moment that you step out of the tub your fins get dirty. Everything gets dirty. Everything is always out of place. Order. Why can’t people keep things in order? What do you want Pisces? I have to organize stacks of paper and make a plan for my spring planting.”

“Virgo, you are so perfect to be a rising sign. Someone with you there will be efficient and effective and do all of those things Earth people need to do. You make sure they eat right and take care of themselves.”

“Well, yes I guess I am. OK I think I have a small opening in my calendar for next November.”

“No, I am up really soon. Can’t you squeeze me in? You can handle one more little detail.”

“That will throw off everything. I will have redo my ten year calendar, and that will force me to finish my taxes at 11:59 PM on January 1 not 11:00 PM as is my norm. No, no that is too disorganized for me. And then my spring planting which must take place at noon on May 15 would be kicked to three or four – oh no oh no…..”

“OK Ok, fine, don’t get yourself in a tizzy, really.”

Pisces is starting to swim in circles now. She does that when she gets overwhelmed. The only thing that pulls her out of her vortex is what looks like a shiny teeter tooter in the distance. “Bounce, bounce, up and down I bounce, bounce I love to bounce back and forth.”

“Libra, it has been so long, how are you?”

“Bounce…bounce….OH Pisces is that you? I am still swinging back and forth on my scales, weighing every issue seeing every side and always trying to bring those sides into harmony. It is a tough job but it is fun – especially for an Air sign – up and down bounce, bounce.”

“I need this favor….”

“Favor? Oh yes, I love to help people – do you need reconciliation with your spouse?”

“Not really.”

“Oh do you need me to work out a problem with your business partner?”

“Nope.”

“Whatever it is I have to help. I love to help…bounce…..bounce. Helping people is my thing. Because if I help then people like me, and people have to like me. I love, love to be liked. Approval is my thing….bounce….bounce.”

“Good then can you take over as a rising sign. You will give that person Venus beauty and a love for all things pretty.”

“Yes but that will take me away from my ….bounce….bounce…..bounce – scales….and I can’t leave them – bounce….bounce…bounce. Oh dear now you are going to hate me…bounce… bounce……..please don’t hate me – I hate when people hate me. Let me fix….bounce…..bounce….bounce…something anything for you. Please……bounce…”

Pisces is getting desperate. She has just a few more signs to go but even she, the fish, is getting seasick here. It is this fear that gives her the courage to visit her fellow water sign, Scorpio, in her deep, exotic cave. Pisces likes being back in the water but can’t figure out how Scorpio can stand all of this darkness.

“Shut the door, you are letting the light in!” The voice is sultry and deep.

“I am? Ouch.”

“Be careful can’t you see my antique ottoman?”

“As a matter of fact…..”

“What can I do for you Pisces?”

“Well I need someone to take my place as a rising sign. You represent water better than anyone and you will give the kid intensity, inquisitiveness and a sexual passion that would serve them well.”

“Yes, that is a given of course but I am just about to solve a mystery that I have been working on for years and then I have to finish watching the Sherlock Holmes marathon on PBS while I ‘entertain’ some gentlemen callers.”

“But hey water sign – to water sign. I will discuss of mysteries of the universe with you for hours if you will just do me this favor.”

“My fixed mind is made up! NO. Besides you discuss mysteries while I solve them.”

“But…”

“NO. Shut the door tightly on the way out. I see a crack of light.”

Pisces is at the edge of her rope. “I hate all of this conniving. I just want to go swim in the cosmic soup – I am part of the cosmic soup – I am the cosmic soup for goodness sakes. Why do I have to come down to Earth? I am so tired. I am so confused – I am so torn in so many directions.”

“Tallyho!”

“Oh Lord Neptune what now?”

“It is I, Sagittarius out shooting my arrow at truth, justice and the universal way.”

“Okey dokey. Um hey Sag. How about running this up the shaft, can you take over as a rising sign for me? You will bring compassion and justice and honesty to the kid and I have to admit I do love your ability to root out BS at one hundred yards.”

“Yes I would and you know I never lie. I always speak the truth. I seek the truth and speak the truth. But I am far too busy to be tied down to a rising sign right now. I have to explore all the various cultures and religions and find my own set of beliefs.”

“Can you multitask it? Gemini is a pro at that.”

“Gemini, air sign – pfffh. I am Fire, I have a duty, and I must search and learn.”

“Hey, watch where you shoot that arrow! And you are a wishy mutable sign like me – you can change your mind. Come on.”

Sagittarius is already racing away. “Sorry. I have yet to see Eastern Bezerkistan. I have to see every corner of the Earth. Maybe when I get back. Look me up before I am off to Guam in the fall. Come splunking with me one day!”

Pisces sees a tall mountain in front of her. Mountains and fish don’t get along – (another thing she hates about Earth.) However, she realizes she has just two shots left to find a replacement so up she goes into the high abode of Capricorn the shore footed Goat. This really grinds Pisces because in reality Capricorn is a Sea Goat…so what the heck is she doing hiding out in the mountains playing the role society expects of her? Another reason Pisces hates being on Earth.

“Ouch” – walking on these rocky roads is not on Pisces list of fun things to do.

“I am late.”

“Excuse me, Capricorn?”

“I am always late. We are always late. Nothing and no one is ever on time.”

“Time is a ridiculous construct. Where I live there is no time.”

“No time! What holds you together? What gives your existence form and structure?”

“Nothing. It is the great cosmic ocean of awareness.”

“Sounds dreadful. What can I do you Pisces? I have a stack of papers to grade and a thousand time sheets to correct.”

“Yes, I know Capricorn you have a lot of work to do keeping societies structures in place but I need a favor. You are so good at keeping people’s nose to the grindstone; at making them do what they need to succeed in life…you should be like the universal rising sign for everyone.”

“Yes, it would be a much more structured world and I would excel at it. After all I do excel in excelling but I have no time. I am late.”

“Time is useless.”

“Blasphemer!”

“Try it without time for once.”

“Be gone with you heretic!” With that the goat stomps her hoof and the fish is tossed off the mountain onto a passing cloud.

“This is the dawning of the Age of Aquarius…Age of….” The music is deafening and as her head clears she sees a tall bearded man, with long flowing hair and a longer robe dancing around a large jug of water.

“Aquarius, how are you?”

“Pisces Que Pasa?”

“Oh it is a long story. Hey Aquarius, answer me something, how can you be the water bearer and an air sign at the same time? “

“Don’t get hung up with definitions. I am what I am – I am new I am different. I am the rebel – the revolutionary who turns your world upside down in a minute. There is nothing normal about me.”

“You know it really isn’t the Age of Aquarius.”

“Yeah but the royalties got me this great cloud where I can play with my cool electronic games, and contemplate all the ways I can influence the future.

“Place looks small.”

“Who needs riches dudette? I took most of the money and set up a universal homeless shelter. It is all about compassion for the downtrodden.” So how it is hanging, fishie? You look a little beat up yourself.”

“Not well, I need someone to be a rising sign and with your compassion and quick mind you will make a contribution to a person.’

“Oh sorry no can do Mi Amiga. I am working with that Apple fellow to come up a computer the size of a pea that will have every app. any human could need. The hard part is making him promise to give all the proceeds to orphanages. How about a cocktail – organic of course?”

As much as Pisces loves alcohol (and I do mean loves) she has had it. Pisces is resigned – a normal state for her– and trudges off to be the rising sign. “OK but I am going to screw it up. This kid is going to be confused and distracted, overwhelmed and just wondering what the heck she is doing here on Earth for most of her life. And I will have to fight not to make her susceptible to drugs, alcohol and gambling. But hey I tried, I never succeed but I try.” With that Pisces sat down dejected and sad, dreaming of the day she can once again return to her cosmic ocean of peace.